Wednesday, February 4, 2009

5 Quick Ideas for Valentine's Day

Let me take a moment to step back from the marketing talk and address an upcoming event.

(Guys listen up)

Sometime in the next few weeks you’ll be asked about something called “Valentine’s Day”. It’s not a real big deal, but in the chance that you would rather avoid any distraction from your job, the time you spend on Twitter, or a cold beer on a cold February afternoon - let me offer you this 5 step program to ensure that after February 14th you'll maintain your title as hero of the household.

Step 1: Start with a slide show – This site will do all the heavy lifting – just make sure you use pictures with you and your Valentine in them, or at least a picture of you holding a picture of your Valentine.

Step 2: Follow this up with a truly thoughtful gift. I recommend this gift that keeps on giving.

Step 3: Then write buy a song that someone else wrote and hack the lyrics. This site will do it (it will take a minute to load) Browse the site to find something that just feels right - if Tex-Mex is not your song style, perhaps try Glam Rock or Easy Listening.

Step 4: Then when you’re looked at with tears of joy, refer to this application on your iPhone to help you through the monotonous dialogue.

Step 5: Finally, dry your Valentines' tears with these and sit back knowing you are truly an exceptional human being.

BONUS OFFER – When it’s all said and done, you may need to enlist this tool to take one of the biggest, heartfelt, thoughtful decisions of your life and make it into a 2-click decision. It doesn’t get any easier than that.

Thank me in March.

Hat Tip to Seth, TechCrunch, Kottke and every other blogger who has helped me prepare for Valentine's Day 2009.